At least have the decency to leave the show at home.
Jose Angel Perales, 24, from Davenport, IA, was arrested for third-degree burglary and third-degree theft, after he broke into a lingerie/sex shop and took the liberty to sample some of the merchandise.
According to The Huffington Post, surveillance footage showed Perales trying on lingerie and anallypleasuring himself with a barrage of sex toys, first on the manager’s desk and futon, then in the main lobby.
Although Perales had assembled a cheap disguise, which consisted of a blonde wig and red dress, police couldn’t help but notice his name tattooed in large, Old English lettering across his back.
The store claimed that the perpetrator had used $1000 – $2000 worth of merchandise; none of which are eligible for resale.
No kidding.